Greetings gentlemen! Why only gentlemen and no ladies you ask??? Well this post really is not geared towards women, I’m sorry. Its okay ladies you are more than welcome take the time out and read this post also, but anyway let’s move along. I am always over hearing women complaining about men that they are uninterested in, attempting to get their number at the club, supermarket, free clinic, Ikea, bank, church, rehab, bbq, beach, Tom Hank’s basement, mall, and etc. Women love joking and laughing about how they turn these dudes down. Well I have news for you, if you like it or not some women kick game to men too and just like women we have a way of turning down the opposite sex who we are not interested in also. Now when I say uninterested I mean like the sneak preview of the movie The Incredible Hulk 3 coming out in summer 2012. Nope I’m not breaking my neck.
Yes, if you’re a male who actually cares about what kind of women you are attracted too, you may share common excuses/responses for these women. For example men may turn down a girl because they might be ugly, fat, has kids, has one/no leg(s), has a lazy eye, smells like apple wood smoked bacon, bald/nappy headed, smokes, ghetto, 6’7, devil worshiper, hairy, bad breath, a drug addict, talks too much, has a STD, she slept with your boy, and etc. Whatever you understand my point! Today fellas I’m going to teach you some of my favorite excuses/responses to tell these unattractive women that you’re not interested. Hopefully my experiences in this topic will be detrimental. Oooo “detrimental” I like that word.
Female: “Hey sexy, wanna dance”???
#2. Let’s Pray. (Bows head)
#3. No thank you I’m kinda tired.
#4. Did someone fart? (Looks around)
#5. (Don’t feel like talking?) Throw your drink in her face* Beat it Monkey Hoe!
#6. I really would love to baby but, my jealous ex con baby mom is here and I’d hate for you to get thrown off a random cliff. You probably have a mom, dad, sister and brother that would miss you dearly. You understand what I’m saying right?
#7. I on beat women.
#8. I was born with a penis and two vaginas.
#9. Now if I dance with you will you promise to buy me a gun so I can shoot myself in the foot for being seen with you on the dance floor?
#10. Hoe you can’t be foreal, did my boy Chris put you up to this? I’m sorry for wasting your time. He alwaaaaayssss playin’!
#11. (After song goes off) So???… uh how much are you for the evening? I only have $3.81 on me? Hope that’s enough for two hours?
#12. Sure baby, we can cut a rug! Hey you don’t mind being on TV though, because A&E’s “Intervention” camera crew is here filming me for their next season???
#13. (Pulls out a stick & throws it) Fetch!!!Uhhh but this time don’t come back… ever.
#14. If you don’t get away from me, I’m going to call the police.
#15. As long as bring your leash on the dance floor.
#16. I don’t dance with men.
#20. Does this dance include happy ending after? I will accept a hot fudge sundae if your lips are broke its coo.
#22. Yeah lets boogie! I hope you can dance like my ex-girlfriend, because I love the way she use to move!
#23. Well Wow!!! I didn’t know unsuccessful abortions could talk and dance???
#24. I have feeling I’m just going to pass you off to my homeboy after 15 seconds of being bored with dancing. So no Thankyou.
#25. I’m sorry, I’m not that drunk yet.
Look! NOW I know what everyone is thinking, most of these replies are going to get you slapped! Your right they probably will get you slapped. Shoot probably might even get you beat up outside the club if she about business! Hey I’m here to give ideas on getting these goblins out your face, not advice about what to do when she pulls out a pistol! My suggestion for you fellas is to be ready for anything. I had a many more responses I wanted to share with you but, I realized that majority of them will get you either killed in broad day light or turned up missing… and I must admit I can’t get more subscribers to my blog site if they are not living anymore.
Hey everyone do me a huge favor please share your personal turn down approaches by commenting & subscribe, before I get mad!!! Thankyou.
My name Vern.